This morning inspiration (or more accurately, total exhaustion) struck. I wanted to stop by the gas station for an energy drink, because I really needed something to wake me up. I don't know what was with me. Between weird dreams and everything else, I was just out of it and could not wake up! I'm not much of one for coffee, so an energy drink would be the perfect solution.
In my brilliance, I decided it was a beautiful morning and the gas station wasn't far, so I would just walk! Why waste the gas? I've been working on this whole sustainable and healthy living kick, so it only made sense. In some way or another it might even make up for my bad little indulgence of drinking an energy drink in the first place. We've had a lot of fresh air and sunshine since we've moved in here, which is great, but a little bit of exercise could never hurt. It's good for you and tends to improve your mood, right?
When I kicked off with my walk I was all cheer. It was just cool enough that I wanted a little something, you know? Some people would probably find it warm enough without more than a sleeveless top, but I'm always cold, so a light jacket, not even buttoned or zipped was perfect. The sun was shining, but not so bright as to blind me. It was perfect walking weather.
It was about two blocks away when I realized my insanity over the whole thing. Walking is so slow! I could have been there and back in less than the time it would take me to walk one way. Think of everything I could do with the extra time I would save! Wouldn't that alone be worth the cost of taking the car?
As soon as these thoughts entered my mind, I wanted to smack them out of my head. What was I thinking? Was this really me? I couldn't believe the thoughts that were passing in my own mind! I used to love the time to simply walk, by myself or with others. It was a chance to enjoy the fresh air, the beautiful weather, and to clear my head from everything that had been gunking it up and making me sluggish. It was exactly what I needed. I really miss those days back home in Boston where I could walk for hours, not caring about the destination, simply to walk. It was freeing. My mind seemed to flow more freely and I was able to open myself up to my own needs, as well as the world around me. It was it's own kind of magic.
Texas has really made an impact on my life, and today made that obvious. Patterns and habits I used to follow and enjoy have kind of fallen away. I've lost my ability to just do for the sake of doing. Simply going out has become an ordeal and a production because it means loading everyone in the car and unloading them when we get there, only to repeat it all when we're on our way back. A chance to run out real quick without the kids is a blessing because the car really does slow us down when there's car seats to fasten and everything else. It would be so much easier if all I had to do was round up socks and shoes and get out the door. We could walk where we were going, walk back, and not have all that fussiness with the car in the middle to slow us down. Better still, my kids would get exercise, which is good for them, and would be plenty exhausted by nap time or bed time that they would actually sleep. I miss those days!
So today I've realized just how much I enjoy, and have missed, the simple act of going for a walk. Maybe this is something I'm going to have to get in the habit of doing more often. If nothing else, it will be good for me, mind, body, and soul.
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